Cookies in Fridge: Hope for those with Long COVID

It’s been a while since I wrote an update on this challenging disorder I live with. Diagnosed with Long COVID in early July 2022, the battle has been ongoing.

Unseen Struggles Behind Normalcy

I look perfectly normal, and seeing me during routine activities like shopping or walking the dog might lead one to assume nothing is wrong. However, the unseen toll of a short dog walk or grocery shopping is akin to a marathon for me, draining all my energy.

Career Adjustments Due to Physical Limitations

In May, I stepped back from full-time work as a Marketing Manager, not because I couldn’t do the job, but because the physical demands were overwhelming. A day in the office with a forty-five minute commute on either side felt like scaling a mountain, swimming an ocean, and going three rounds in the ring with a heavyweight boxer. The impact, unnoticed by many, left me unable to climb stairs, focus, and with mood swings.

Rebuilding and Adapting: A Shattered Life

Rebuilding a shattered life is not easy. Today, I take rest days, engage in freelance work, and work a few hours a week at the local newsagent and post office — a fraction of my former workload at significantly reduced pay. Exhaustion is a constant companion.

The Cookie Jar Incident: Symbolic Mistake

Today, a simple brain fog mistake reminded me of the daily challenges. Making coffee when tired is confusing enough, but when I put the cookie jar away, I placed it in the fridge instead of the cupboard. This mistake encapsulates the hidden side of a condition that even doctors struggle to fully comprehend.

Discovering Positivity Amidst Challenges

Long COVID isn’t all negative. It’s challenging and frustrating, impossible to describe to those who don’t live with it. Despite the struggle, my abilities and skills cultivated over 30 years persist; the challenge lies in bringing them to the surface.

Shifting Priorities and Attitudes

No longer concerned with coming last, completing something, or even just participating has become a victory. My attitude has changed, and I don’t mind not being present for celebrations. With Long COVID, finding and sticking to one’s own lane is crucial.

The Impact on Creativity and Writing

As an author, Long COVID has been dreadful. Creativity has dwindled, and reading long sections with comprehension is impossible due to brain fog. My novel needs editing, but I can’t even read or critique it — I need a professional editor. Writing another Space Ranger Fred book has taken over a year, contrasting with the couple of weeks it used to take.

Addressing the Wider Long COVID Community

There are 2.8 million of us in the UK alone with Long COVID, many of whom were once at the top of their game. Dreams taken away, lives put on hold, and happiness drained, yet none of us are useless, failures, or devoid of hope.

Embracing Hope: Finding Your Lane

Hope comes from the lane we choose to stick to. Finding a baseline, a place to balance and move forward is crucial. It requires guardrails, guides, signposts, and support. Hope necessitates a single step, taking a chance, and stepping out in faith — ignoring doubt and naysayers.

A Personal Journey of Hope

Uncertainties about recovery, book editing, and earning real money persist, but hope remains. The journey involves perseverance in my chosen lane, refusing to be swayed by doubts or external opinions.

Conclusion: Fighting Back, One Step at a Time

As I put the cookie jar in the fridge, I’m reminded that small setbacks shouldn’t overshadow greater priorities. Long COVID may feel like it’s beating me, but I’m doing my best to fight back — in my lane, in my time, and without worrying about being late for the party.